Wednesday, August 19, 2015

Getting selfish

Greetings friends and family,

I turned a corner sometime last week where I've become significantly more selfish and greedy and jealous.  My time with Kendra is more valuable than ever before because I have a renewed sense of desire for her time and to be with her.  She has regular outings with friends and I am more than happy for her to experience friendships and life and give me special Daddy time with the twins.  Even so, I look forward with a countdown timer to the moment when the kids are in bed and Kendra is home with me so we can be together.  I don't feel bad one bit either!

Being a chemo patient is a full-time job.  that's what I heard the ladies in the doctor's office saying today when I went with Kendra.  She gets poked by a needle at a doctor's office six days a week.

Tuesday - blood draw to test levels
Wednesday - Curcumin IV administered at the naturopathic office
Thursday - chemotherapy (3-6 hours)
Friday - neupogen shot to boost her immune system
Saturday - neupogen shot again
Sunday - neupogen shot..  again!
Monday - no doctors or needles.

Repeat that cycle ten more times and you get an idea of what it's like to be Kendra between now and the end of October.  Our life and schedule revolve around Kendra's doctor appointments, but when we consider the alternatives, we are more than willing to adjust and accommodate.  Her body is tired from the continual beat-down from the all the chemo.  Her mind is tired from the never-ending scheduling, driving, needles, and side-effects.  Her emotions are healthy and her spirit is perfect.

Kendra's PET scan is coming up sometime in the next two weeks.  We don't know when yet, but from what I understand that will be very helpful in knowing Kendra's prognosis.  We are believing there are no new tumors and the ones in her liver and spine are continuing to shrink.  This is the best possible outcome.

On the lighter side of life, I took Easton to his first NFL game to watch the Cardinals get beat.  Layla stayed at home with Kendra to read books, paint toe nails, and spend some quality girl time together.  Unfortunately I didn't get any pictures of Layla's time with Kendra, but I do have one of Big Time with me at the game.  The A/C on the charter bus was broken when we left for the stadium with my coworkers.  It was a record setting day for the hottest temperature on that day.  113 degrees!  We drove to the bus barn and waited outside for another bus.  the second bus had A/C, but it takes an hour to cool down a bus.  We arrived at the stadium 30 minutes late after spending two hours on the bus ride, which should have taken about 40 minutes.

Anyway, once we arrived everything smoothed out.  We had great seats and a great time.  I explained the rules of football as Easton fired question after question at me.  He was having so much fun that he didn't want to leave when the game was almost over.  

I haven't given up on the 4 Webbs blog.  I don't even have any excuses for the lack of posts other than my selfish reasoning where every minute spent here writing is another minute I'm not connecting with Kendra.  When she is snoring and I'm not yet tired, that's when I have time to do this blog thing along with job related work, executive pastor opportunities, and other unimportant tasks like sleeping.

This is by far the most intense schedule I've ever had, but the best part about it is how fast time is flying by.  I find it hard to believe Kendra's big cancer adventure started over five months ago.  There is so much about this adventure that I hate, but the part I love is how much closer Kendra and I are to each other as a result.

See you soon!

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