Fuzzy Jar

Hello friends and family,

We are always looking for ways to improve our parenting approach because there is no such thing as a bad student; only a bad teacher...  Or so says Mr. Miyagi in the Karate Kid.  

In our quest to focus on positive reinforcement we started with a "star board" on the fridge where each kid had their own categories of good behaviors such as eating their food without being told, putting toys away, and brushing their teeth.   We, the parents, would use a marker to make a small star next to the associated good behavior.  We kept telling them once they filled up all the stars in the all categories they would get some unknown reward as a good consequence.  

They understood, but I could tell they felt detached from the process because all they saw was the added star in some nebulous category.  It just wasn't connecting.  Then I saw another parent's idea and decided to give it a try.  

I took Easton and Layla to the store and we chose the plastic (not glass) clear (so they could see inside) container with an easy lid (so they could open/close it themselves).  Let me tell you, searching for those jewels was like finding a needle in the haystack.  Turns out Hobby Lobby has everything including the containers which met ALL of my criteria.  

Anyway, after we found the container I let them pick out stickers to decorate and personalize their "fuzzy jar".  Then I bought the multi-colored, super-sized pack of pom-poms with a variety of sizes.  We took home the supplies and they decorated their own fuzzy jar complete with their own names.     

When they make good choices they get good consequences!  We pick out the size of the pom-pom to fit the success (small, medium, large) and they get to choose the color.  Also, they each have a specific toy they have physically touched, which they will get when the fuzzy jar is full.  They know the good choices expected and the good consequences they will receive.  This way they are involved in the whole process.  After our first 10 days it seems to be working well.  I hear many more "Yes, Mom!" responses and quick obedience in action since we started.  Only time will tell, but it's worth a try!

We teach them "Slow obedience is NO obedience".  :)

Our house has many visitors throughout the week and we are enjoying the connection with new friends.  During the day Easton and Layla ask, "Who is coming over for dinner?" and if I reply with "Nobody" they ask, "why not?"  They are as welcoming as Kendra is.  Easton finally figuring out how to eat a taco with two hands although he hasn't got the head-tilt quite right yet.  I never realized eating tacos was an art until I tried to teach the twins how to do it.

Anyway, Morgan jumped into the picture and photo-bombed his shining moment.  We all laughed and I didn't mind at all.  I'm glad friends are feeling comfortable enough to do crazy stuff like this.    

We are wrestling with what to do next year for preschool.  It costs a bunch for three days per week so we may just do two half days.  Kendra is still undecided on the decision of what to do with their kindergarten year...  She will home-school them or send them to public school or maybe even private Christian school.  Three options that are all valid.  Luckily Kendra has a year or so to figure it out!

See you soon.